Soon after my 2015 diagnosis, I was with some work colleagues and shared my news. And… before I knew it, I was being flooded with advice.
“You should try this treatment.”
“You need to see this practitioner.”
“You should take these supplements.”
It came from a place of caring, I know that. People genuinely wanted to help. But when you’re already trying to process fear, uncertainty, and major decisions, relentless advice from every direction can feel overwhelming.
But the interesting part was that I was so triggered by these comments.
At first, I focused on them and how uncomfortable their opinions made me feel. But by this point in my life, I’d done enough inner work to know that if something was triggering me so strongly, it was worth looking in the mirror.
And there it was.
I realised I often did the exact same thing.
I had a habit of offering my opinion, advice, or perspective without being invited to do so. Not because I was trying to control anyone, but because I cared. Because I thought I was helping.
But did I enjoy having unsolicited advice pushed onto me?
No sir.
So why would others?
That moment was a powerful lesson for me.
An Opinion Is Not a Truth
These days, I try to be far more mindful about offering advice unless someone actually asks for it.
Do I always succeed?
Hell, no.
Sometimes I still blurt things out before engaging my brain. But the difference now is awareness. I can usually catch myself and recover when I do it.
Because opinions are just that—opinions.
They are not facts.
They are not universal truths.
They are simply someone’s personal perspective based on their own experiences, beliefs, fears, and conditioning.
What feels right for one person may feel completely wrong for another.
And until you have walked someone else’s journey, sat with their emotions, faced their choices, and carried their fears, you truly have no idea what you would do in their situation.
Listening Is an Underrated Gift
I’ve come to believe that listening is far more powerful than advising.
There’s an old saying:
“We have two ears and one mouth for a reason.”
Yet so often, instead of truly listening, we rush to fix, solve, correct, or share what we would do.
But sometimes people don’t need solutions.
Sometimes they just need space.
Space to vent.
Space to process.
Space to feel heard without someone hijacking the conversation with their own opinions or experiences.
Being deeply listened to is one of the most healing gifts we can offer another human being.
The World Has Become Too Comfortable With Opinions
Social media has amplified this issue enormously.
People sit behind screens throwing opinions around as though they are facts, often without considering the damage their words may cause.
We see people torn down daily.
Judged. Criticised. Shamed.
And for what?
What is it within us that so quickly moves towards negativity instead of kindness? Why do we feel entitled to project hurtful opinions onto strangers we know nothing about?
At its worst, this culture leaves people feeling less than who they truly are. And tragically, sometimes the consequences run far deeper than we realise.
Words matter.
Energy matters.
Kindness matters.
Pause Before You Speak
This experience taught me something valuable:
Not every thought needs to be spoken.
Not every opinion needs to be shared.
Sometimes the most respectful thing we can do is pause, listen, and allow someone else the dignity of their own journey.
Support doesn’t always look like advice.
Often, it simply looks like presence.
A listening ear.
An open heart.
A moment of compassion without needing to be “right.”
And honestly?
The world could probably use a little more of that.
